Hello, this is Bradley Bailyn, and this is episode number 11 of the legal podcast. Today, I want to open up by telling you a joke. This is one of my favorite jokes and it’s called Interview Day. So there is a gentleman and he dies and he meets with God. And God says to him, “Would you like to go to heaven or would you like to go to hell?”.
He says, “Can I see both? And then I’ll let you know.” God said, “Sure.” So he takes an elevator down to hell and God says, “This is hell.” The elevator opens up, and people are laughing and smiling and drinking and smoking and gambling and doing all kinds of things. And there doesn’t seem to be any punishment for what they’re doing. And he’s like, not bad. Not bad. Can I see heaven? So God says, “Sure.” God puts him back in the elevator. They go back up. The doors open up.
Everyone is sitting there praying and concentrating and singing when they’re not praying and blessing the Lord.
And the guy says, you know, I hate to say it, but this is boring. I think hell is probably a lot better. God says, “OK. Come back tomorrow.” He comes back tomorrow, gets in the elevator, it opens up and he sees a lake of fire and people are burning and screaming and the whole bit. And he says, “But this isn’t what I saw yesterday.”
And God says, “That was the Interview Day.” Get it?
So my point here is that it’s the same thing with contracts. I have so many clients who come to me because they really like the person they want to do business with. And they’ve had the contract sent to me. And I’ll say, “Listen, they’re talking really nice to you, but this contract tells a very different story. Are you going to believe what you’re hearing on interview day or are you going to believe what the contract says?” I can tell you from plenty of firsthand experience, not just tell you, but I can absolutely promise you from firsthand experience that you should believe the contract and not what the seller tells you.
Someone who’s very close to me got into a situation where he wanted to rent some space. So he goes to rent some space and he’s met by a guy who’s really relaxed. He’s a physician and says, “Yeah, you know, I’ve got this building. I inherited it. I don’t really know much about it. I went on the Internet. I downloaded some kind of form. I don’t even know if this is legal or not. But you know what? I really don’t care. This is completely between you and me. If you want to get out for any reason, just let me know. Give me a month’s notice and you’re out of here. To me, everything is done on a handshake. The paperwork is just a formality.”
He says, “Really nice guy” and signs the contract. He doesn’t read it too carefully. What happens? He decides he wants to leave and all of a sudden the guy says, “Oh, no. It doesn’t matter who else you find. Even if I find another tenant, you’re still going to need to pay me for another nine months (or whatever number of months were left.) And he says, “But why? You know, we shook on it!” And the Landlord says, “Read the contract. What’s in the contract is what we agreed to. See right here the line that says there were no oral agreements other than what’s been written into the contract.”
And he says, “But we shook on it and you told me that you’re a really nice guy and you just got found this on the Internet. Just a formality.” “There’s nothing formality about it. This is our agreement. I expect you to live by it!”.
Turns out the Landlord was one of the most litigious landlords in the state of California. And just because someone talks pretty and smiles big and dresses casual does not in any way, shape or form mean that they are not a shark. And that’s something that I want my clients to understand when people say, “Oh, your lawyer is just giving you a hard time. You know, it’s just a standard contract.” There’s very few standard contract situations.
And I have to say to my client, “Listen, I can’t tell you what to ultimately do. All I can do is bring to your attention all of the issues that they are refusing to cooperate with you on and all of the ways that I can see that they have available to really mess you up. And the fact that they refuse to change any of those things, that should tell you something. And then from there, if you wish to accept those risks, you can go right ahead and accept those risks. But you need to understand that some of those things are going to happen. And when it takes your attorney a little bit of time to try and protect you and list all of the things that need to be done and you feel like your attorney is just making the deal harder, your attorney does not always make the deal harder when the person on the other side is fair and reasonable. The contract slides right through. But a lot of times when you seem to be getting a very good deal and you’re very excited, it’s because there is a big bag of poison hiding right on the other side. And I see it and you don’t see it. And that’s why you hired me. And so, you know, I hope that you will put a little bit of faith in me or whatever other competent attorney you choose to work with, that when we put all of these risks in front of you, we’re not just making your life difficult. We are potentially saving you years of agony.”.
All right. So again, my name is Bradley Bailyn. I’m a New York City business attorney. If you have anything that you’d like me to cover on this podcast, or if you have a question, my phone number is 646-326-9971. My email is brad@bailynlaw.com. And please don’t forget to click the subscribe button here if you have one. Thank you. And have a wonderful and safe day.
